I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
