she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize