And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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