Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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