things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
