so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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