This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
