you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize