how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Naked. naked and bneed help.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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