did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize
