he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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