Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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