She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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