I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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