Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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