at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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