butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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