your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
do herpes really smell.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
