I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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