You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
