Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
the liver wants what the liver wants
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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