My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
