You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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