your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
