It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
