hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
she was so not down for the gang bang
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize