the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Randomize
