At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
two words: eviction party
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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