I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
