Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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