i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Did you just see the Batmobile???
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
