Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize