Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
