Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
