So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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