Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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