belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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