Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Randomize
