More tranny stories later!
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
