wakey wakey hands off snakey
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
