He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
