that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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