So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
