Got a toothbrush?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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