Define "chronic" masturbator.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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