Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize