We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
