so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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