Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
