my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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