Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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