After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Randomize
